–

And now, contributor Jarod Hendrickson compares the teams of Hockey East to alcoholic beverages, because it’d be unconstitutional for me to hog all the tenuous metaphors for myself. By the way, now that Derek is basically a figurehead and Matt’s job has absorbed all of his free time, I’m more than happy to accept other contributions…if you wanna write something, message me or our page on Facebook and let me know.

-Max

Contributor’s Corner: The alcoholic’s guide to Hockey East

by Jarod Hendrickson

As students return to campus and mini fridges are being plugged back in, let’s put on
our fun hats and break down what each Hockey East school would look like if they
were a beer. [Editor's note: The captions are courtesy of yours truly. -Max]

Boston University

Sam Adams. Classy, full bodied, and a staple of Boston. A rich history and a national recognition. Not as arrogant as other beers, and is something you respect, even if it isn’t your pint of beer. [And probably the only one I'd admit to drinking on this list. -Max]

don't be silly, BU kids only drink the finest champagne out of escargo-rimmed crystal glasses

Merrimack

Four Loko. What exactly is it? I mean it will get the job done but something just isn’t right, just like Merrimack itself. They’ve only been around since 1947, and the campus
resembles a strip mall. Basically non existent it’s entire history, Merrimack has burst
onto the college hockey scene in recent years, but like Four Loko, all good things will
come to an end. Their “arena”, and we’ll use that term loosely, is a dump, if it were
an animal it would have been shot a long time ago. Overall Merrimack just a fad, and
people will look back thinking, “why did we even bother?”

this guy certainly went to Merrimack. Haha just kidding, nobody goes to Merrimack.

Boston College

Guinness. It’s good, arrogant, and something that must be dealt with a few times a year.
Comparing it against lesser beers really never works out, but on occasion that shitty
light beer tastes better (hey that’s us!). Always leaves you full after going toe to toe for a few rounds.

I'll take the classy high road and not mention blood stained beer cans on the Green Line here.

University of Maine

Bud Heavy…rugged, in the cup holder of diesel trucks, and a staple of an entire state.
Aside from pro Boston teams and a couple minor league teams in Portland..Maine
hockey is all the rage (the “maine” event, if you will) [I will not. - Max] . There might be better, flashier beers out there, but it’s hard to top Maine hockey.

lol "weiser" like "wiser" only less wise because it's Maine

UMass Eastern Massachusetts State College at Lowell

Colt 45. Poor Lowell, literally. The fat, ugly stepsister of UMass is located in the armpit of Mass. Every season of Cops should have been filmed here, they’d have plenty of material. [Again, I think "High on Crack Street" trumps this. A lot. - Max] Lowell hockey may look promising at times, like that occasion where you’re considering partying in poverty with Colt 45, but just avoid it and you’ll be happy you did.

I would have gone with Poland Spring vodka, personally. Or cocaine. Either is accurate.

Providence College

Odoul’s. Providence doesn’t bring much excitement to the table, just like Odoul’s. From the dry campus to the well patrolled parking lot, making tailgating impossible, PC is PG-
13. Although they’ve climbed out of the Hockey East cellar this year, we may have to
bump them up to Mike’s Hard next year.

reminds me of that first scene in 30 Minutes or Less that's almost kinda funny before Swardson and McBride showed up and ruined the rest of the movie

The University of Massachusetts

[redacted] [Jarod wrote something here comparing our fine university to Busch Light. Surely he was drunk or someone hacked his Twitter or the Patriots were showing him the wrong down on the scoreboard or something. UMass is hereby represented by Snake Juice. High-end, VIP, exclusive. An ounce of this will *lit'rally* kill you. Now shut up, I'm tired and I'm drunk and I need more Snork Juice. Yes, I realize it's not beer SHUT UP THAT'S HOW AWESOME IT IS - Max]

it's about to get ca-razz-ey.

University of New Hampshire

Keystone. Oh New Hampshire..where to begin. The nicknames are endless, the south of the north, Alabama with snow, and so on. If New Hampshire was relocated to the
south, no one would notice. [Hey, I resemble that remark! - Max] UNH has won a total of 0 national titles, despite high expectations most years, shitting the bed year after year. Until they break through, and even after, New Hampshire will always be the trailer trash of Hockey East.

look at that horrible road. fitting.

Northeastern University

Northeastern hockey just screams, “Hey, we’re here to party, but don’t bother taking us seriously.” It doesn’t help having to share the city with two perennial Hockey East frontrunners. Northeastern is the first friend you have that reaches blackout status, he’ll be fun at times and entertaining, but in the end no one really cares because his tolerance sucks and he’ll just end up throwing up in your bathroom.

LOL BETTER STICK TO LITE SO YOU CAN IMPRESS THE LADIES DURING NO-TEE OT!!!!1

University of Vermont

Vermont is..different. They’re not on the way to anything, except skiing and endless
bottles of maple syrup I guess if you’re into that kind of thing. [And Canada! - Max] It’s no mystery that UVM’s campus is filled with hipsters, and what better beer to represent them good ole PBR.

or moonshine, if you're Tim Thomas

So there you have it. Enjoy the great sports weekend at UMass, and as always, drink
up.

- Jarod

For hockey, it means two games against the Angry Birds of UMass Lowell. I’ll skip the early-season reverse-jinx gimmick this time around and stick to the fact that Rowdy’s gang has wharrgarbled their way to a 9-6-0 start, a year after occupying the basement of Hockey East and occupying it hard. The University of Massachusetts ran off a five-game winning streak against its estranged crack whore sister coming into the year, then for some reason loaned their uniforms to the AIC Falcons and sent them on a bus to the Tsongas Tscenter in late November for a 4-0 loss that was never really that close. Even in the days of pro agents and scouts at ice level juggling flaming swords to distract Marcou, Irwin and Wellman, I’ve never seen a Minutemen team as disinterested in a game as they did back in November. Those were very bad times.

That, obviously, can’t happen this weekend. The Minutemen are 7-0-3 on their home ice coming into Friday’s showdown. They have a massive rest advantage, having played just twice since Frozen Fenway, while Lowell will be playing their fourth and fifth games in eight days. UMass stands four points back with equal games played in conference, and a sweep, unlikely as it may seem for a team that hasn’t had a four-point weekend in seemingly forever, would catapult the Minutemen past the River Hawks in the standings with the tiebreaker. And this is not the Lowell team that was crushing folks back in November. Lowell was blanked 1-0 by Alex Beaudry and the Friars tonight in Providence, and since edging BC 3-2 in December, they’re just 2-3-0 in the conference, all against teams in the lower half of the standings, and one of those wins was literally handed to them by Northeastern.

The River Hawks’ success has largely come thanks to the emergence of Doug Carr, who (contrary to what Beaudry’s and Rawlings’s mothers would like you to believe) is probably the conference’s best goaltender this year. They’ve also gotten unexpectedly strong contributions from upperclassmen like David Vallorani and Matt Ferreira, who have thrived in new head coach Norm Bazin’s system, and youngsters like Scott Wilson and defenseman Chad Ruhwedel, who seems to be picking up where past Lowell defensive stars like Nick Schaus and Jeremy Dehner and Maury Edwards (when he was still good) left off.

Lowell, unbelievably, entered the night third in the pairwise, thought losing to Providence dropped them into a tie with – hey, lookit that – Boston College. The Minutemen are in 24th, which would be awesome if this was basketball RPI, but where only the top 16 make the tourney, there’s plenty of work to do. Still, UMass’s ability to take advantage of its few quality non-conference foes (Yale and Cornell) puts the team in a good spot. Almost every Hockey East game is good for the pairwise. As bad as the season started, the Minutemen are also just six points out of a home ice slot behind Maine, with three games in hand (and two more shots at the Black Bears on the schedule).

This weekend holds a world of importance for UMass, given the opportunity to improve their standings, improve in the pairwise, drop a hated rival, and get the student base fired up from the very first hockey weekend of the semester. If they can’t get fired up for at least the Friday game, it’s back to the “slightly bit concerned” mode for us. If they come out flying like they did against Vermont, though, and actually get some puck luck this time, and avoid penalties, I’m much more confident in this team’s ability to protect a lead. Lowell’s scored a grand total of three more goals than UMass this year in Hockey East play. Their edge, of course, is on the defensive end, which is why getting the lead early is key.

And would it hurt to win a fucking road game? Jeez. Anyway, the three of us will be there on Friday and Walsh and I will also make the tstrip to Tsongas on Tsaturday, so if you can’t make it to the games (for shame!) we’ll have some commentary for ya on @FightMass. Did I mention there’s no underscore anymore? There’s no underscore anymore, get used to it.

–

Now, ahem, basketball. The past week was down-and-up for the boys. Wednesday at Duquesne was one of those ugly, foul-plagued conference games that we’ve been so used to seeing over the last couple years under DK, and the Minutemen never got into any sort of rhythm in an 11-point loss to the Dukes. The team’s lack of depth with the Sampson and Cady injuries hurt them inside, forcing Sean and Putney to play soft, while Chaz had probably his worst game as a Minuteman, turning the ball over like it was going out of style. And worst of all, we had to endure the worst fucking commentary you’ll ever hear in a radio broadcast from the Dukes crew. And don’t give me that “well how can you complain about a pirated video stream” bullshit, I watched that game with my UMass All-Access Pass somehow, thank you very much. I pay like ten bucks a month for that shit.

And yet as much as I complain about the UMass broadcasts on Twitter and make fun of Maurer’s extra syllables and Hennessey combining hockey players’ first names into their last, at least both of UMass’s announcing crews call games in a fairly unbiased manner. I’ve always thought that, if you take Jack Edwards and Tom Heinsohn out of the equation, we Boston sports fans have some pretty fair announcing crews on both TV and radio, and even those two have Brickley and Gorman to temper their respective outrages. Duquesne, meanwhile, had this trifecta of failure mucking it up in the booth:

1) Old homer who clearly hasn’t left the Pittsburgh area in 60 years, seamlessly incorporating his own random thoughts into what is supposed to be straight play-by-play,

2) Token former player spouting random SportsCenter catch phrases without providing any actual useful observations,

3) “Stat boy” with a voice whinier than John Wallach’s (!) who has never touched a basketball in his life, doesn’t understand how travelling works, and shouts “CARRY!” every time Chaz touches the ball.

When these guys weren’t bemoaning the lack of calls in Duquesne’s favor (even though the fouls were going their way at like a 2-to-1 ratio for almost the entire game), the three of them decided by halftime – based on one bad performance – that Chaz must be the worst point guard of all time (you know, even though he’s 23rd in the nation in assists) and that “this is why Hofstra didn’t want him.” OMG that’s just classic, y’all are hilarious!!1 Hey, remember that last time you guys were in the NCAA tourney in 1977? No, and neither does anyone else. Shut up, dipshits.

…

…Ahem, but here’s the beauty of this season: the “bazkettaball” is the exception, no longer the rule. Case in point – UMass came out three days later and pulled off a good road win at Richmond in front of a surprisingly solid crowd (and I say this because basically everyone else in the A-10 has a solid home crowd by our standards). Chaz bounced back and carried the team down the stretch with some ridiculous passes, everyone played great defense in the second half, Carter had one of his better offensive games, and the team once again got enough offense from enough different sources to win.

No disrespect to Gurley, but part of last year’s struggles (besides the glaring hole at point guard) was that the Minutemen couldn’t develop a consistent second scorer to support AG, who took it upon himself to take too many shots trying too hard to carry the scoring load. Without him, the Minutemen have been forced to spread the wealth (and, again, having a real point guard who himself is a scoring threat has been a massive help in that regard). Rarely this year has one guy clearly been the lone offensive weapon, although Chaz himself is the team’s leading scorer. Some nights it’s Jesse, some nights it’s Putney, but for the most part, the scoring has been very evenly distributed when the team is playing well.

So let’s keep that ball rolling. The Minutemen are 15-5, 4-2 in conference play, and with the season 2/3 of the way down, can rack up 20 wins just by playing .500 ball down the stretch. That said, the competition gets fiercer, with seven of these games against teams in the RPI top 100. The Minutemen can – and kind of need to – win the other three, which are two against a hilariously-bad Rhode Island team and then a roadie against a not-good-at-all George Washington. Of the other seven, here’s what’s left:

Home: Saint Louis, St. Bonaventure, La Salle, Xavier

Road: St. Joe’s, Dayton, Temple

A 20-win season, provided they notch those three cupcake wins, means winning just TWO of these seven games. They can make this process a lot easier on Saturday when Fat Majerus and the Billikens come to town. Last year, the same Billikens got a white-hot three-point shooting performance at home to down the Minutemen. This year’s team has some quality-ish wins against low-level major conference teams like Villanova, Washington, and Oklahoma, but all either at home or neutral-site. They’ve hung around in some tough roadies against New Mexico and Dayton, but are overall unimpressive away from the Gateway Arch, which I should point out is nowhere near the Atlantic Ocean. (Really, the Billikens were trailblazers in this whole “play in a conference that makes zero geographic sense” trend.) This would be by far their most impressive road win. UMass is unbeaten at home. I say these trends should continue.

Saturday afternoon needs to be the biggest home crowd of the season. Needs to. The athletics department has been pimping this game out hardcore to students and locals alike. It’s the first home game after the long break, during which UMass actually won a televised game (albeit on a channel that nobody really gets). It’s a 2:00 start, which gives students zero excuse – you can part Friday, go to the game Saturday, and it’ll be over long before anything is going on again Saturday night (AND it gives the hardcore fans plenty of time to make the drive to Lowell with time to hit up Lowell Beer Works before the nightcap!). The midweek loss against Duquesne probably went unnoticed to much of the student body – in fact, let’s not talk about that game anymore, it never happened, don’t tell anybody. And the Billikens may not be the biggest draw on the schedule (that’d be Xavier, recent struggles notwithstanding) but Majerus is a big enough name and Saint Louis is at least more recognizable than, say, La Salle or St. Bonaventure. And the team is fucking 15-5. It’s time to stop with the negative stigma around this team. As Don Orsillo would say, they’re back and they’re back big.

Hockey fans who scoff at the basketball team ads on the jumbotron, I implore you – just go to the game. Unless you absolute despise the game of basketball, which means you’re not an American anyway so it’s cool. But otherwise, go. Yell your brains out. It’s a fucking Saturday afternoon, no excuses, you’ve got no other plans. Bring other people. This might not be an NCAA tournament team this year – not quite yet – but I think we’re finally, finally seeing the emergence of something special in this Kellogg era. Be part of it, or get left in the dust when the bandwagon takes off next year.

That’s all I got for ya. We’ll try to record another FightCast this weekend, maybe. Until then, enjoy the games. I know I will. It’s about time this program had two teams playing meaningful conference games in the second semester.

-Max

Well, talk about “being like Mike.” Kid went out last night and proved everyone wrong.

The Minutemen blanked Boston College, 4-0, shutting out the Eagles for the first time ever. Yes, ever. BC outshot UMass 35-19, but a good chunk of that came during a third period that UMass spent killing penalties and generally just trying to turtle with that big lead – after all, they’ve blown a lead in seemingly every loss this season. And yeah, you have to think BC was looking ahead to Saturday’s Fenway game against Northeastern, which is, in fact, happening (despite the fact that even NESN isn’t showing it on TV, thanks to their boneheaded move of securing broadcasting rights to a basketball conference that contains only one New England team, which happens to be the consensus worst team in said conference). And yeah, the holes in that BC team are beginning to show (they lost too much on offense and in net, and even the best blue line in the nation can only carry you for so long).

So, all downplaying aside, Mastalerz stopped 35 shots, and while many of them were of the half-hearted variety, he did make a few that would make even Timmy Thomas tip his cap (okay, specifically I’m talking about the one 24 seconds into the highlight reel). And regardless of all the belittling I tried to do in that last paragraph, no UMass goalie had ever shut out BC before. Not Gabe Winer. Not Jon Quick. Not Paul Dainton. But Mastalerz did it in his third collegiate start, and he looked damn good doing it.

Really, the story of last name’s game is that the defense continues to play well, up and down the lineup. Much like the last game against the Eagles, UMass played a smart, opportunistic game, got a quick shot from Allen past Billett, caught a couple breaks off of turnovers leading to two-on-ones, and after squandering a few giveaway chances in the first, took advantage of the same opportunities in the second. Peter “Peterangelo” DeAngelo got the first UMass shortie since the season before last. TJ Syner put a couple of non-empty net goals in the net for a change, and continued to look like a flash of lightning out there from time to time. The key was to get an early lead and really force BC to start thinking toward tomorrow. UMass almost didn’t do that, committing some dumb penalties in the late first period that nearly led to an Eagles lead, but to their credit, the PK continued its recent solid stretch, and UMass converted on that momentum with a second period that has to rank among their finest all season.

So let’s look at the grand scheme of things for a moment. Lowell lost in hilarious fall-from-ahead fashion to Vermont, and suddenly the Minutemen, as “miserable” a season as they’re supposedly having, are just two points behind the supposed River Rat powerhouse, albeit with Lowell holding two more games in hand, but there’s no question which direction these two teams are trending. We could take a defeatist attitude and talk about the race for 8th place, where UMass has a comfy seven-point lead on Vermont for the basement, and thanks to last night’s results, a point up on UNH and two up on Northeastern. In fact, UMass is just three points behind Maine for home ice with a game in hand on the Black Bears. The best part of all of this? UMass has a home-and-home with Lowell, two at Maine, and two at the Bill against the Wildcats, plus another Matthews visit. And there’s still time to catch Merrimack, with that season series waiting to begin. Sure, the Warriors are #3 in the conference, but you have to like that the Minutemen have five of their six meetings with BC and BU out of the way already – and a respectable 2-2-1 record in those games to boot. (Even if it should be 4-1-0 with those two BU collapses. No, damnit, POSITIVE THOUGHTS)

Okay, getting-carried-away aside, Vermont comes in next weekend. Bury them.

- Max

P.S. Hey, oh by the way, UMass plays St. Joe’s at 4 in hoops, in a battle of two top-70 RPI teams. UMass is a bit short-handed with some injuries and needs all the crowd noise/energy help it can get. I won’t be able to make it, but I saw plenty of students in the student section watching on TV last night, so I know y’all are there. You know you don’t give a shit about the Saints-Niners game, and you’ll be home in plenty of time to watch Tebow-Brady II. Go, and be loud. Please?

Jokingly, a few weeks ago, in response to counter-criticism to our blog’s continued (perceived) crusade against Michael Marcou, I promised that, should Mikey score an overtime goal this season, I will rename the blog in his honor for the remainder of the season.

Well, shit.

Frozen Fenway was an absolute blast, despite less-than-stellar sightlines, questionable choice of officials (Bunyon and Keenan? Really?) and the fact that we had to share our beloved Fenway with the unwashed, toothless masses that occupy three inferior state institutions. From our awesome pregame at The Lower Depths (extra props to Skinnier Andy Dwyer, our new favorite bartender of all time) to the moment Marcou snuck that rebound home in the waning seconds, ’twas an experience like no other. Now, Matt and I stayed afterward to watch UNH-Maine, despite our proximity to literally the worst human being we’ve ever encountered in our lifetimes (the supposed Maine fan? or maybe UNH? or Lowell? in a brown hoodie surrounded by people clearly horrified to be associated with him). I think the entire experience kind of college-hockeyed us out a little bit, to be honest. And it did sort of suck how unprepared they were in terms of stocking the merch stands (at the end of the game, all the UMass shirts had long flown off the shelves). But all-in-all, Hockey East and Fenway did a great job hosting an event that none present will soon forget.

All that being said…it’s a narrow win for UMass over a horrible, horrible Vermont team, and the Catamounts had numerous opportunities to steal this one. Especially troublesome is the continued taking of dumb penalties by the likes of Yevenko and Kiley, although I think the former brings more to the table than the latter. Kiley’s penalty was followed by an embellishment call that we, err, didn’t quite care for to say the least, but to UMass’s credit, they survived the five minutes at the end of regulation and start of OT. Of course, having seen the game on NESN replay now, it’s more clear than ever who really won that game for UMass. Tegs made some outstanding stops early in OT to keep UMass in striking range. With all respect to Mastalerz, I think it’s becoming clear that Boyle is the starter and Teglia is #2, albeit maybe less dramatically so than Quick/Dainton were with Meyers. I’m positive Boyle will be in net next weekend against BC, but finally getting that first win has to be huge for Jeff’s confidence.

More than anything, though, this game affirms what the numbers have slowly been hinting at for weeks now: Mike Marcou is no longer a laughing stock, and I was only half kidding when I tweeted during the Providence game that I see Mikey having a huge second half. Yeah, he’s prone every now and again to a bad turnover, and I still vividly remember seeing him commit the worst turnover of all time that somehow didn’t actually lead to a goal during the Harvard game. But he finally – FINALLY – seems to be comfortable on the offensive end of the ice handling the puck. More often than not, his positioning defensively has been stellar. And, when the Minutemen desperately needed at least three out of four points this week before the going starts getting tough again, you could reasonably argue that he earned UMass those three points with his game-saving blocked shot against PC and the walk-off winner at Fenway.

Now, get this – UMass leaves Fenway ahead of two of its fellow participants, as Vermont falls deeper into the cellar and actually leads UNH by a point. Remember, the Minutemen go to Orono for two and host the Wildcats for two, all in a two-week span toward the end of the season that now looms pretty large. I hope it doesn’t come to this, but I could see those four points at the Bill determining 8th and 9th place for UNH and UMass. Here’s the bigger surprise – UMass trails Maine by just five points for home ice (!) with two games to play and a game in hand. True, Lowell lurks in the middle there, but as we’ve seen in years past, the second half is where we will see if these upstarts like Lowell and Providence are for real.

So bring on the second half. Just as this team was left for dead around Thanksgiving after a few abysmal performances in a row, so too did this fanbase – ourselves included – basically give up on Marcou making the most of his potential after his atrocious, injury-plagued junior year. I never expected to say this, but…be like Mike, guys. (Wow.)

- Max

Yeah, welcome to the digital era, where the future will be televised. On the radio. On the, err, Internet. On the Maine. I should stop talking now. Just listen. Disclaimers:

- We recorded this last Friday right after the CCSU game, so the material is slightly dated. But hey, I managed to get it posted before the next UMass game, so there’s that. Besides, none of you were gonna listen to it at all during New Year’s anyway

- It’s an hour long. Load it on your iPod and drive somewhere while listening to it.

- Language. Par for the course here, but uhh yeah, not safe for work.

- Inside jokes. There are some. Sorry.

- There are a few rants, including Matt about UMassHoops, and both of us about politics. It’s got some rough edges. Deal with it.

Anyway, it’s all kinds of fun, so without further ado:

THE FIGHTCAST EPISODE 1

So also, there’s hockey tomorrow, not that anyone cares because Frozen Fenway is coming up and Providence, ho hum, been there done that. However, our intrepid Jarod Hendrickson, who by the way is the only person writing Contributor’s Corner articles these days hint hint someone write for ussssss! anyway, here’s another look back at the Florida games and ahead to a rematch with the Friars. The Fight Mass boys won’t be there, but Jarod’s planning on making the trip down. Take it away, J:

Contributor’s Corner: “Providence/The Town Preview”

UMass looks to turn the page to 2012 with a strong start to the second half of the season. The Minutemen put in a solid all around game and upset #13 Cornell at the Florida College Classic behind a pair of goals from sophomore Conor Sheary. They then fell 5-2 to Maine in the championship game the following night, going 0-5 with the man advantage. UMass now finds themselves at (6-8-4) (2-6-3 HEA), good for 9th place in the standings.

Moving on from there…Saturday…Jan 7th…Fenway Park. A day we’ve been all looking forward to for a very, very long time that hasn’t come soon enough. All that stands between our beloved team and that epic experience is a date with Providence on Thursday. As usual, these two points on the line are huge for the Mass Attack, who currently find themselves on the outside looking in at a playoff spot. The good news is only 3 points separate 5th place Providence (8-8-1)(6-4-0 HEA) and us, a 4 point weekend would go a long way into propelling UMass back up in the standings. The Friars have surprised a lot of people this season, playing solid all year and sweeping a then #1, unbeaten Merrimack last month. But hey, we beat #1 BC, so that’s a wash. Providence has started the new year with a 5-2 loss to Brown. PC is led by freshmen Ross Mauermann (6 G/8 A) and junior Tim Schaller (9 G/4 A). Alex Beaudry (7-7-1, 2.93 GAA, .898 save%) should be in net. This game is no pushover like the past (like we won those anyways..) and UMass can’t overlook this game while having their sights set on Frozen Fenway. I’m looking forward to be making my first trip to PC and seeing the game in person, and they better not disappoint. This game offers a great tune up for Saturday’s tilt, and hopefully UMass can gain some momentum going into Fenway.

And then there’s the biggie. The granddaddy of them all (sorry Rose Bowl)…Frozen Fenway. After a two-year hiatus, college hockey is back at the cathedral of Boston, starting with your UMass Minutemen vs. Vermont at 4pm followed by UNH (sucks) vs. Maine at 7pm. The games will also be televised on NESN as part of their “hockey is really fucking awesome day in New England”. What an amazing experience this will be for all fans (yes even UNH) involved, especially those making their first ever trip to Fenway, including yours truly. The logo and signs for these games should read “Frozen” Fenway. Thanks to global warming, this ass backwards winter season will continue through the weekend. The flask in my back pocket will be cooler than the temperature for the game. The forecast for Saturday calls for a high of 48 degrees with sun and 10% chance of rain. So the fans will be drunk AND comfortable. The ice…meh at best. If you thought you’ve seen shitty ice at the Mullins, we’re all in for a treat this weekend. Expect slow, sloppy play, forcing teams to go to a “back to basics” game plan. Short, crisp passes will be key, and UMass’s speed will be hampered by the conditions. There’s nothing we can do about the weather, however, it is what it is and both teams will have to deal with it. At least it’s not supposed to rain (knocks wood). Both goaltenders will have to adjust to the changing light and the unique sightlines Fenway presents. Which leads to the question of who will occupy the net for UMass. It’s been a guessing game all season, but I see Teglia (0-4-1, 3.30 GAA, .891 save%) getting the start Thursday and Boyle (5-3-3, 2.99 GAA, .898 save%) in net at Fenway, although it’s definitely possible for Boyle (who’s emerging as our #1 goalie) to pick up both starts. As for Vermont (4-13-1)(1-9-1 HEA), they’re awful. Like a “only have 3 points in Hockey East and are in 10th place” level of shitty. Despite this, UMass dropped a 2-1 decision up in Burlington last November, getting only 19 shots on goal and giving Vermont their first and only win in Hockey East so far. The leading scorer for the Catamounts is Sebastian Stalberg (7G/12A) and their backstop is Rob Madore (3-10-1, 3.96 GAA .865 save%). So yeah, it’s a game the Minutemen can easily win, yet as they’ve proven with bottom tier Hockey East teams in the past, can also inexplicably lose.

The Minutemen’s keys to victory need to be simple for Fenway. Their penalty kill is third worst in the nation, so it is crucial they stay out of the box. Weather conditions will play a factor, so smart hockey and a full 60 minute effort should put UMass in a good spot when the clock hits :00. This is going to be an unreal experience, so take it all in and enjoy this awesome privilege we’ve been given. On this day, UMass can have nice things, and hopefully they can deliver a win to cap off a great day of hockey.

————–

So there you have it. I’ll try to write something after Thursday’s action on the ice (as well as basketball’s A-10 opener against Fordham), but if not, you probably won’t be hearing from us until Saturday. See you all at Fenway!

-Max

]]> http://fightmass.com/2012/01/05/fightcast-episode-i-the-maine/feed/ 0 bittym87 http://fightmass.com/2011/12/29/matts-inane-pregame-notes-i-guess-ill-pack-up-my-mind-edition/ http://fightmass.com/2011/12/29/matts-inane-pregame-notes-i-guess-ill-pack-up-my-mind-edition/#comments Thu, 29 Dec 2011 23:16:21 +0000 blindspots88 http://fightmass.com/?p=1004 ]]>

Hey y’all, your (ahem, our) UMass minutemen hockey club is less than 2 hours away from the first game of the rest of their lives in Not really close to the cool parts for 20-year-olds, Florida. Tonight, UMass will be taking on James Lizardo’s own Cornell Big Red, by far the best Academic institution ever named after a gum. Cornell is currently ranked #13 in the nation and has a defense that can, and will goddamnit, be referred to as “the balls”. They are letting in less than 2 goals per game and have let in 6 goals in the last 8 games with FIVE shutouts.

Fact is, this could get ugly. UMass has had the tendency of going down early and if this is the case tonight the likelyhood of coming back is slim to none. Hopefully Boyle (I’m just assuming he will be starting) is a bit better at taking shots from academics than he was against Harvard (cue Bob dylan eeeeeeeeeeeeh) and to a lesser extent, Yale. Personally, I am always dubious of the high rankings given to these Ivy schools verses the entirety of Hockey East, but Defense is something that usually transcends hype but when its against teams that may not be as good as advertised, who knows.

UMass is not a favorite in this game by a long shot, and all likelihood is that we will all be chilling in Clarksonville tomorrow but this team has good against bigger name teams and the first game after winter break is usually a wildcard (who knows, maybe all the Ivy kids got fat off the hopes and dreams of the middle class durring the holidays). Plus, while UMass is great at home its entirely posible they are just shit durring away games (Fact: goaltending has been a problem durring such games). While this is in no way home, its not technically an away game. So theres that.

On the actual “game consumption” front, the crack Fight Mass research team is actively looking for a video stream, but in the meantime John and Brock will do just fine.Any updates/links to video will be posted to the twitter account so get on that.

Also, be sure to go to Fear the Triangle’s live chat which starts at 7:30. I think he’ll post a coveritlive link on the site but honestly I have no fucking idea. There is at least a 67% chance I’m kicked out of this thing. Should be a cool night. Geometry jokes all around.

Here’s to the second half of the year not sucking (cut to me chanting “pleases don’t suck at calendar).

-Matt

But yes, what a season we have endured so far. The highest of highs, the ineptest of ineptitude, golly gee this season has had it all. And, because I’m Matt and I’m the lazy one, we are going straight towards bullet points for this rip-roaring recap.

Massive Highs

• Ah, where to start but beating BC. If there was ever going to be a signature win for this program, that would be it. Up to that point, I had never seen UMass beat BC. Like, ever. I came in to UMass and became a fan of the program during 2009, the Jimmy/Casey year. My first taste of BC/UMass hockey was December of 2009 where BC beat UMass 3-1 at the Bill in a relatively close but sluggish game. I was one of the few fans left in the student section after the 7-1 abortion of a game that was the official beginning of the Cahoon swoon/understanding what it means to be a UMass fun. I was there in the Conte (Cunte, lol) on the glass watching the Minutemen let it go in OT. I was there for both losses in the HE Quarterfinals watching any remaining potential for the Wellman/Marcou era drip away. I )was (not, thankfully) there for a 5-0 thrashing early into last year’s often painful campaign. I was there late February where a UMass team hitting its sweet spot (NOTE: sweet for that team was not losing by 4 and allowing 68 shots on Paul Dainton) lose by 1 two nights in a row of a home-and-home. I watched that same team lose 2 more spirited yet fruitless games against BC in the HE finals where we bid goodbye to the team as they boarded the bus back to Amherst (and inversely found out that Doug Kublin was aware of the Kubby Kounter). Just a few months ago I saw UMass get beaten completely and comprehensively by BC at Conte, where we bore witness to the first Teg-Stand game of the year (Seriously, Teglia was the only reason that game wasn’t 11-2 and it continues to be the reason I prefer Teglia over Boyle, but more on that later). So, to review, thats 11 games, 10 in person, with the exact same outcome: an overwhelming desire to punch somebody in the face. So, going into the game there wasn’t much hope. Hell, I’ll admit I seriously questioned going to the game as I assumed it was a guaranteed loss. A number one team versus a team that got beat by Providence with a goalie that got pulled the night before? Not a great precursor. But this team made it happen, literally every piece of the team came to win and they did it in fairly convincing fashion. It was a highlight in a year that, even by the most liberal predictions, was going to be up and down. The words “holy fucking shit we actually beat BC” were uttered by both friends and strangers as UMass fans went home deliriously happy for the first time in a long time. When I went back to the Boston area for thanksgiving, random members of my girlfriend’s family (who are from Hingham, a BC stronghold if there ever was one) as well as one awesome gas station attendant were talking about UMass beating BC. And then I realized, oh yeah, this is what happens when we win. Its a good feeling.

• Speaking of what happens when we win big, I would like to officially welcome Charley “The Maven from Lock Haven” Molnar to the UMass family.(Some fun facts about Lock Haven University: The Bald Eagles play Field Hockey at a D1 level in the A10 and  their football team holds the longest losing streak in all of NCAA Football with 43 straight losses) You may know Charlie from being the offensive coordinator for the most insufferable college in the world, having the almost comically impossible accomplishment of holding a coaching position at every directional Michigan university and having THE BEST INTRODUCTORY PRESS CONFERENCE IN UMASS HISTORY. Holy shit this guy has balls. Listen, I was the one with a big ole’ man-crush on Mike Leach (most likely for his overwhelming weirdness and FRIDAY NIGHT LIGHT CAMEO) but Molnar is exactly the type of coach UMass needs to build the program: vocal, charismatic and with experience in the midwest. All signs point towards him being able to recruit the rust belt states that require a long suicide inducing drive through Western Pennsylvania to get to and thats whats going to be needed to field a competitive team. Texas and California recruits are not happening in big numbers right now. What the recruiting plan for UMass should be is “live in big University setting with lots of (southwest, Camby aproved) pussy and have your family and friends see you play 4 times and year. Come on fellas, get on the UMass train!” and at least we know Molnar knows how to pitch that.

• While I was on board with Derek in saying Connor Sheary was going to be the best non HoPS player on the team this year, I gotta say, Guzzo is giving him a run for his money and absolutely locked down “bestest surprise breakout gumbo!” player of the year. Guzzo’s passes have been spectacular, his defense gritty and he’s shown a bit of a scoring touch as well. He has the uncanny ability to be in the right place at the right time and for a team that has a long illustrious history of having players in the wrong position at all times, its a welcome change. Plus, kids got a perfect sports name. So many U’s. Gotta love yelling GUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUZZZEE.

• Chaz. Need I say more? Chaz is the biggest game changer in the DK era and is proof that a point guard is key in the college game. Yes, the team has struggled at times this year, but never have I had the optimism that the team could win on any given night than I do this year. Even with Ricky, the team was consistently below par. But with Chaz I see players that would otherwise be fighting to have the ball passed to the so they can put up a bad shot settle back and trust that the point guard will find them in their spots. Not only that, but Chaz can create his own buckets in traffic with ease. Its great to see this team run after years of it being the obvious thing we never do.This team may not be tops of the A10 but they won’t be at the bottom either and for the first time in the DK era the team is overachieving (albeit from fairly low expectations. Its finally (kinda) fun to watch this team and thats more than enough for me.

Fight Meh:

Hey we have 3 goaltenders that don’t suck. Hell, we have 2 goaltenders that are above average. But golly, I still don’t think we have the shut down goalie that UMass needs to be a top 4 team in Hockey East. Let this run on paragraph be my official entry into the 2011-2012 Goaltending debate. Ok, well lets start with the obvious. Kevin Moore, keep on bloging baby, you are not going to tend net for the Minutemen this year. Stephen Masterlerz of puppets? Yeah, you are not our goalie either. We were assured by the Father of Connor Sheary that Masterlerz is the best of our goalie bunch from seeing him play in prep school, but that supposed superiority has not shown through. In fact, Masterlerz has not proven himself to be an equal of his fellow goalies. So we must say goodbye to Masterlerz in the Fight Mass goaltender search. Now ,judging from the media and fan alike, the consensus UMass goalie of the season/future is Kevin Boyle. However, I would disagree and say, as of right now, Teglia is the better goalie. There is no doubt that Boyle has gotten much better as the season has progressed, but Boyle still gets me nervous as fuck when I watch him play. His positioning is good but hes a bit slow to cover and he’s never seen a shot he didn’t want to turn into a rebound. Don’t get me wrong, I like Boyle and think he’s a viable long term option, however I truly believe that one of the largest attributes of Boyle’s success has been luck. Teglia, on the other hand has suffered from terrible luck this season. He’s been hurt, and when he has been healthy enough to start the team has played like absolute crap in front of him. As previously mentioned, Teglia was the lone shinning star for UMass when they played at BC early in the season, and when playing at BU, Teglia was the reason the game even made it to OT after horrendous play in the 2nd and 3rd. Boyle is a great technical goalie, but Teggs (yeah, we’re switching to that) has that uncanny ability to make the holyfuckingshit save, an attribute I will refer to as standonhisheadability. Lest the term be broken down to its literal meaning, Teggs can stand on his fucking head. Its Daintonian in a way. Teggs suffers from the same “WHY ARE YOU PLAYING THAT PUCK IDIOT” moments as Saint Paul did, but at the same time he makes the same amazing saves that keep you in any game. There was always an unshakeable feeling during the Dainton era that made you feel some glimmer of hope going into any game. “Yeah, we probably won’t win but if Pauly has a good night we have a punchers chance”. Teggs evokes that same feeling in me, and golly, The “Tegg Stand” is too good a term to be wasted. Thats why I think Teglia should be G1 of the Dillon Panth….I mean UMass Minutemen.

Other things that are happening

Well gang, that was a fun little “unreadable block of text-athon”. Lets do some quick thoughts then go the fuck to sleep

• Seriously UMass, where the fuck are my Frozen Fenway jerseys DO NOT FUCK THIS UP UVM HAS ONE AND SO DO I. I swear to god I will make this a reason I’m not giving to UMass when the annual fund calls before I stop and go to the confused freshman “lol no but seriously here’s $100 go away I’m poor”.

• Oleg has become, so predictably, a fan favorite. But the student section doesn’t understand the smashing Oleg produced in the first few games was bad and he’s been  exponentially better lately. “Oleg , smash, ugg why didn’t he hit that guy” “BECAUSE THAT WOULD BE A PENALTY YOU STUDENT SECTION IDIOT WHY DO YOU LIKE SEEING OUR PK EDDIE OLCZYK IS NOT THAT FUCKING EXCITING”

• But seriously folks, hats off to the PK and standout Eddie Olczyk. Good job buddy.

• The banner is a 6 at best, but it blows away the UFO Mullins center theme Max made last year that we trashed so thoroughly he made the poorly made Kubby banner which I still hold as my favorite. It was like the potato chip. Badger Max and good things will happen out of pure spite.

• HAHAHAHAHAHA MAX ADDED A SNOW THEME THIS IS THE WORST BLOG EVER I WOULD COMPLAIN BUT I HAVEN’T WRITTEN ANYTHING IN MONTHS AND DON’T EVEN COUNT AS A WRITER ANYMORE.

• Also, I tap my proverbial stick to Max who manned the twitter account a few times recently. Every time he has run the twitter account it has been funnier, more insightful and, in general, more better. I would let him have it because of the better quality but fuck that the twitter is mine and you will have to rip it from my cold dead hands before I give up the one thing I do competently.

• Mike Marcou hasn’t been terrible this year, but it still makes me nervous to watch him play. I assume this is what its like for a parent to watch their kid drive. “Him? Driving? The same one that drove the tricycle off the porch and broke his leg?”

• I know the out of touch white folks on UMassHoops disapprove, but I’m kind of obsessed with the Shakespearian nature of the Freddie Riley twitter feed. First, it used to be abovetherim1 or some close variant but now its @youngFLYandAshy which makes me laugh for reasons I’ve yet to understand. But Freddie has the most perfectly absurd twitter ever. He hates UMass some times (don’t we all sometimes), openly has an air of annoyance when he has a bad game or doesn’t play and retweets some of the best tweets ever (example, from yesterday: “the people that be in the video game stores be looking weird as shit”). Not only that, but Freddie himself has some classics. One time he tweeted simply “taking a shit”. But the cool thing about Freddie is that him twitter feed makes him come across as a tortured genius/curmudgeon. He’s oddly political, calling out blacks for buying too many Jordans and pondering to himself whether he should become the voice for black people. He went apeshit on the Steve Jobs love (rightly) calling him an unredeemable capitalist that never gave back. And while other players hide their feelings from the message board trolls Freddie lets it all out. He misses High School, is confused what he will do after UMass, and seems generally uncomfortable with his status as a Basketball player within the UMass culture. In other words, he’s a fucking human. Yes, me and Freddie got into some twitter beef last year where he called me out for being over critical in my tweets during a game and I called him out for being an offensive liability. However the thing that I have come to appreciate is that his response to the blog is such a uniquely Freddie Riley thing to do. He wears his heart out on his sleeve and doesn’t think twice about telling a blog to fuck off after it comes and makes 10 Big Shitty jokes in 2 hours. Freddie doesn’t write for you, Freddie writes for himself and if you want to come along for the ride so be it. My obsession with the Freddie Riley twitter has made me appreciate Freddie as a person. Yeah, he’s a frustrating player to watch, but the talent is there and watching such an emotionally complex human struggle through life is an amazing character study. I root for Freddie, and I can honestly say, beyond the obvious choice of Chaz, Freddie is my favorite player. I root for him so fucking hard. I really want to see him succeed, After 2+ years of watching him bear his soul online, good and bad, I see him as the scrappy underdog. This run on paragraph is entitled: How I learned to stop worrying and Love the Freddie Riley.

• I’m in love with the Fight Mass spam queue. The spammers are getting fucking crafty. Example 1, on a random contributors corner post: “And to think I was going to talk to someone in person about this”. Other one’s are equally vague and out of place but intentionally misspelled. On the same post: “I’m impressed! You’ve managed the almost ipmsosible” and, my personal favorite, on a random Max essay: “If infomration were soccer, this would be a gooooooooal!”. Haha, I love you spam queue.

• Fuck you autoplay on UMassathletics.com. That shit is annoying.

• Charley Molnar has 8 kids. That guy either loves to fuck or hates birth control. Don’t let him near Matt Hill.

• Oh cool, we got the local kid to come to UMass. As a QB. When he was being scouted as an LB. By other shitty teams. Well, Ladies and Gentlemen, the Kellen Pagel era continues!

• Less than 2 weeks to Frozen Fenway. Fuck Yes. More posts when that happens (hopefully).

Feel free to complain about how terrible this post is,

-Matt

A few of our favorite things:

- Hockey, as we established when last we left you, is coming off of a pretty impressive showing, a win and a tie against two Ivy League teams that have been performing reasonably well this season. Of course, even that fucking zoo movie probably looks pretty entertaining compared to the disaster of the previous three games for UMass, but it was good to see signs of life. Anything we say in terms of a full midseason recap is going to pale in comparison to the absolutely wonderful mid-season recap posted by Awesome Triangle Dude, but needless to say, we’ve been pleasantly surprised with the play of guys like Guzzo and Sheary, and the recent improvements of Yevenko and Boyle. And hell, Fredo Marcou hasn’t been a disaster this year, though he still provides a bit too much high blood pressure in some defensive situations disproportionate to the amount of offense he supposedly generates. But hey, if you told us a few months ago that he was gonna put up 8 points and a +1 at the break after what happened last year, and we’d launch a federal investigation into what you’re smoking. And I even gave him the coveted “player I’m betting will have a breakout season” tag that I gave to Chase Langeraap last year with positive results.

- Basketball. As with last year, the awesome start has tapered off somewhat. At first glance, this year might look a lot like last year in the first 10-15 games. Last year they rushed to a quick start against mediocre teams, many of which experienced some less-than-advantageous travel conditions. This year they played some bad teams playing on more reasonable rest, and then embarked on a rough stretch of three games in three games (two against some pretty good competition in FSU and CoC, both losses), followed by travel home for a game, travel back to play a decent Miami team in a close loss, back home, and back down to ECU again for a nailbiter of a win against a team they should paste. Since that stretch (which is unlike anything they had to deal with last year), they’ve seemed to recover nicely, and are steadily adapting to not having Sampson Carter out there. I’ll say this – Esho and Lalanne are working their way into more and more playing game every night they’re out there. After a few lackluster showings, grinding out a win against a good Davidson team should boost everyone’s confidence going forward. Just gotta avoid the old-fashioned let-down.

- Charley Fucking Molnar. Oh, so THAT’s what a head coach looks like. I forgot after Brown left. Have you seen the press conference? Go to UMassAthletics and watch it. No, fuck you, porn or CoD can wait, do it now. I didn’t get around to seeing it until last week and I get why the big-wigs are so enamored of this guy now. Holy shit can this guy orate. I’m actually reminded a bit of Obama when he was campaigning. And while Obama’s approval ratings are sort of Morris-esque right about now, something tells me that running a football team might be a little less difficult than being, oh, I dunno, the leader of the free world.

Let’s pump the brakes for juuust a second and point out that he’s never been a head coach at any level before. And the guy he’s learning from right now, Brian Kelly, isn’t exactly a Calipari-level mentor like Cal was to DK. But Molnar does have a lot of experience in the conference UMass is going into, having worked at all three directional Michigans. He’s already brought in a big recruit in local kid AJ Doyle, a recruit I’m so excited about that I don’t mind that a) he went to CM, and b) that I just linked to the Herald. And believe me, both of those things would normally bother me.

Most importantly, Molnar sounds like he has exactly the right mindset for this job. Unlike Morris, who came in with “hey, let’s build a team that might occasionally be competitive in the CAA” as his mentality, Molnar, with admittedly-higher stakes and with way more resources at his disposal, knows what we really want. With all due respect to the Akrons and Bowling Greens of the world, this move, to be truly successful, is about the future, about using the MAC as a stepping stone to greater things for the entire athletics program. In the greatest of all possible timelines, that future is probably at least 6-8 years down the road, when UMass plays in the NBC Presents “Community: The Movie” Bowl on the network that inherits the void left behind when FOX goes out of business. Meanwhile, back in real life, we’re looking at more like a decade-plus, and Molnar seems to understand that. It’s not gonna happen overnight, especially having to build an FBS roster from slightly-below-scratch. But the good thing about next year, honestly, is that the team’s not eligible for bowls yet. They have a year to assess just how much catching-up this program needs to get into position, and they have a couple of holdover QBs that Doyle can understudy. I hope the fans have the patience to stick it out if the going is tough early, although I think the big edge Molnar has over Kellogg here is that, while DK was taking over a team that was on the brink of capturing the fans’ excitement with Ford’s NIT run, Molnar is taking over for a lame duck who certainly coached like a lame duck for his entire tenure. We’d be crazy to expect results right away – what we’ll be looking for is progress. I got a good feeling about this one.

- The new banner. Sweet and simple. Figured it was time to change it up. Lemme know what you think.

- Laughing at other peoples’ expense. Look, rape is never okay, but while we have tons of sympathy for Trivino’s RA, we will shed not a single tear for the dismantling of that Terriers team over the past couple weeks, with both Coyle and Trivino leaving the squad. Merrimack’s return to earth? Yeah, #1 might have been a bit of a stretch – hopefully we’re seeing the start of some sort of Dennehy Downfall in the same vein as the infamous Cahoon Swoon. And on the hardwood? Nobody’s feeling bad for Xavier for losing games due to suspensions stemming from that trainwreck of a brawl in Cincy. Getting the heartiest laughs, though, are your 1-11 Rhode Island Rams, who have a 12-point home win against Hofstra (RPI #270) to their credit. Yikes. The Jim Baron era might be dwindling down to its ugly, ugly face- I mean, conclusion. The only downside is the RPI hit our conference is taking, but it’s worth it to see those yokels suffer. Fight Mass mid-week Rhody Road Trip this year? Probably not…but it would be fun.

- Fenway Park. Less than 2 weeks. Joy.

Bah, humbug:

- You know what? I’m still feeling jolly, so I’ll keep the negativity brief. But let’s be honest: ninth place in Hockey East this year, in what is really kind of a down year for the conference, isn’t gonna cut it. Yeah, the boys are keeping a lot of these games close, and there’s some shoulda-couldas in there (opening night, the BU series, etc.) but the results are what matter, and this year we were expecting a bit more growth. There’s a lot of season ahead, and plenty of games against the teams immediately within striking range in the standings, so no need to panic just yet, but if they drop the first two to PC and – gasp – the Fenway game vs. UVM, then it may be worrying time. Gotta win at least one of these…two puts them right back in the thick of things. Remember, we still have ‘Mack three times…it’s not getting any easier.

- Student turnout at hoops. It’s, eh, still on the lacking side. The good news is that the home schedule is actually pretty solid. Xavier, St. Louis, St. Joe’s, and Charlotte are all teams that are at the very least in the “receiving votes” conversation. URI at home for senior day is always a good proposition. And La Salle and St. Bona’s aren’t awful this year. Really, the only sucky scheduling quirk this year is that the Davidson game was during intersession. The next two are not big draws, but the students are out of town anyway. If the team can actually keep the wins coming, word of mouth has to eventually spread. That’s not to say you shouldn’t be helping, dear readers. Talk up UMass hoops. Those of you who don’t really care for hoops? At least you can hold your damn tongues when they show the promos at the Bill instead of groaning about how much the team sucks. I groan when they advertise the women’s game not because they’re women, but because the team actually is legitimately terrible and has been for a long time. Men’s hoops has a chance to actually make something of this season. If you’re not gonna support them, stay out of the way.

To be honest, I think it’s gonna take cracking the top 25 for the student interest to be revitalized. I’d love to be proven wrong this year. At least we have the hard-working efforts of the Mullins Militia out there. Keep up the good work, boys…it’s at least looking better than the last few years. Progress!

- Our posting. Hopefully now that Matt has a new wireless keyboard thinger for his iPad, he’ll be contributing to more than just the Twitter. And Walsh? Where’d you go bro?

Honestly, having a full-time job makes it pretty damn hard to keep up with this thing. I dunno how the Triangular one does it, but our hats are off to him.

Alright, a couple days and we’ll be back to chat about the Florida tournament and the CCSU game. Enjoy the last few days of 2011 and try not to drink too much eggnog. And remember, if years were Christmas then this December would be the December of our December.

- Max

“The Good Left Undone”

Last week was that time of the year again where hockey fans take a break
and ponder what we’re thankful for. One game comes to mind right away for UMass
fans. BC! We beat #1 BC! One of my most memorable nights as a sports fan. After
that, they smoked Holy Cross 7-2 and put a solid effort in to top Northeastern 4-2
the following night. A three game win streak, how about that. I’d love to stop there
and say our next game is against Maine, but it’s not. After coming back from two
goals down to tie Maine 2-2, the Mass Attack have dropped three embarrassing
losses in a row to Lowell, an utterly awful Vermont team and…Quinnipiac? The win
streak seems like a decade ago, and this team is in complete disarray. I honestly
don’t know how they beat BC, where did that team go? The team is now (4-7-3) and
(2-6-3) in Hockey East, tied with Maine in 8th place with 7 points.

Our powerplay sucks. Not too eloquent, but it conveys the right message.
UMass is 1-22 in their last 22 chances. For a season total the team is only converting
17.7% of their chances. Unacceptable. The once high-powered offense has gone cold,
generating just 16, 19 and 21 shots in their last three games respectively. Before
that, the Minutemen were averaging a little over 34 shots through their first 11
games. It’s not just the fact that they’re losing to awful teams, but HOW they’re
losing. This isn’t just shitty luck in OT, or a bad bounce giving the opposing team the
close win. No, UMass has been thoroughly outplayed in all facets of the game (aside
from goaltending, which ironically enough was the major question mark going into
the season). They look slow and disinterested. As far as the QU loss and future
losses to ECAC foes, it doesn’t matter for our Hockey East standings, and an at large
bid is beyond out of reach. The next two games are at home, starting this Friday vs
Harvard, followed by a Wednesday night tilt against Yale. Although these are
basically two exhibition games, they can serve as a tune up and a chance to get back
on track for the second half of the season against our usual Hockey East
competition. Aside from a 3rd period comeback that fell short at Quinnipiac, there
has to be major concern that the team appears to have zero desire to compete. If the
Minutemen drop these next two games, they will be in a complete tailspin they
might not be able to recover from. If this lack of effort continues, the season could be
lost by the end of January. And let the grumblings about a coaching change begin,
because it sure as hell looks like we need one right now.

- Jarod

———

Well, if Jarod is representative of the average denizen of the student section (and damnit, he is), a tie against Harvard and a win over Yale have to have gone a long way toward soothing all of y’all’s concerns. Granted, the inability to actually keep the lead against the Crimson is slightly concerning, but I don’t think anyone can argue against this: the effort, focus, and drive were not present at all against Lowell, Quinnipiac, or Vermont, and you could feel the wheels starting to come off of an already-shaky train. 1-0-1 against a decent Harvard team and a nationally-ranked Yale squad doesn’t have any direct impact on UMass’s conference record, but they desperately needed that boost going into the holiday break. Of course, they still have a holiday tournament ahead, two more games that could either instill further confidence or put the momentum to a screeching halt before January opens with a trip to Providence and then, on the exact opposite end of the excitement scale, Frozen Fenway. For now, let’s relish the chance for UMass to regroup and get healthy, and come out with a renewed sense of purpose in the second half.

—-

Lowell beat BC last night, 3-2. Guys, I can’t believe I’m saying this, but Lowell is for real this year. If there’s one saving grace, it’s that the guys they’re winning with are Blaise recruits. Blaise might be one of those great recruiters who just sucks as a head coach. Of course, I’d rather have a guy who’s good at both (ahem, Mark Dennehy), but maybe it bodes well for the future? Whatever. I may hate Lowell the school, but it’s hard not to like what their hockey team is doing. Good for them.

—-

Basketball beat Siena by four last night, as Chaz and Freddie bailed the boys out in the last ten minutes after a lackluster first 30. The gimmicky defense is starting to show its holes, and the offense is far too reliant on guys getting hot, but at least Riley is continuing to (finally!) thaw from his early slump. Siena’s a better team than their record, but UMass needs to make a statement against QU next time out – if you’re gonna play a cupcake schedule, you can’t sleepwalk through most of the game and rely on hot shooting to bail you out, even if that has worked so far. That said – after what happened last year, I can’t imagine this team coming out flat against Central Connecticut State. (…right?)

-Max

That said, let’s check in and see how things are going for each of those teams.

Hockey:

Last night’s game against Yale was immensely encouraging in a lot of ways. UMass fought through a tough start (three penalties in the opening minutes) and put together a strong all-around effort for the rest of the game in a 3-1 win that wasn’t really even that close. It shows the team building off of its 4-4 tie with the Crimson of Hahhvahd, a game that itself served as a return to “actually trying” after the team pulled a Seguin and slept through its previous three.

Let’s take a moment here to address something mighty troubling. I got in some hot water a few games ago for taking some cheap shots at a few ditzy puck sl…err, scantily-clad female fans who came to cheer on their beloved Northeaste-wait, which one do we go to again? Where’s Kelly? But the Harvard game brought something much more harmful for UMass’s reputation than the most stereotypical Swestiest Swesties ever to set foot in the Bill. I’m talking, of course, about the dumb fucks who took it upon themselves to toss their chuck-a-pucks onto the ice during the game.

I feel like actions of this degree of stupid warrant a sternly-worded “fuck you” to the offending party (or parties…we’ll never know if it was the same kid, since from my vantage point, Mullins security did absolutely nothing to try and track the kid down, and it took until after the second offense for Goldstein to inform the audience that you’re, you know, not allowed to do that). Let’s forget for a moment that the stoppage of play that resulted from the second puck-chucking led to a UMass penalty that led to a game-tying Harvard goal, though there was, graciously, no actual penalty for the incident. Why the fuck would you do such a thing? How fucked up do you have to get before (okay, let’s be honest – during) the game to think this is a good idea? I’ve been to UMass games in some pretty intoxicated states. Lest you forget, I invented a version of the Jaegerbomb that has a higher alcohol percentage. But I know my limits, and I know the fine line between “rather” drunk and “fuck the consequences of all actions I might take” drunk. I might be giving the kid(s) the benefit of the doubt here, but I would hope that it would take a high blood alcohol level to make such a dumb fucking decision.

But what really defecated on my (and all reasonable UMass fans’) parade was that this somehow managed to happen twice. Whether it was the same kid or not, the fact that there was no public shunning of the offending party – in fact, quite a bit of appeased laughter – is a painful reminder that this student section has a ways to go before it escapes its own reputation. I appreciate the efforts being made by those in Section S, which I will always consider the “true” student section regardless of how asinine it is that they sit by the goal that UMass only shoots on once and with a limited view of the corner on the other side of the UMass bench. For the first time since my freshman year, there are kids up here who are actually trying to lead this diverse, ragtag group of variously-dressed, variously-cheering, variously-informed hockey fans and/or casual observers and/or Puffton pregamers. I feel like this is going to be a losing proposition until the team achieves some actual success and generates a following for more than just the spectacle. Just look at UVM. They had a few good runs, sent St. Louis and Timmah to the NHL, and now they have a great student section for a team that’s even more god-awful this year than UMass, their last meeting notwithstanding.

I think I speak for the other two (even if they won’t admit it) that the efforts of the Militia and a few rows of kids who “get it” are a step in the right direction, but for the Bill to return to the levels of intimidation unmatched since the four-game sweep of Maine in ’06, it’s gonna take some stepping-up, a lot more creativity (like the “Do my homework” chant! The guy who started it is awesome) and a lot less “Fuck you Harvards.” And an “ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh SEE YA ASSHOLE” for the fuckhead who throws the pucks on the ice, as he gets dragged out, barely able to stand, after getting pointed out by the rest of his row. That’s what things are like at the other nine schools in Hockey East, guys. Even Lowell and even fucking Merrimack. (Okay, maybe not Providence, but they would if anyone showed up to games.) It’s not weird, it’s not tattling – it’s called being a fan and not wanting your team to get a fucking penalty and/or injury because of some douche in the stands. And that, folks, is your sternly-worded “fuck you.” Thanks for coming and let us never have to speak of this again. (I’m choosing to act as though the wave started by the student section never happened, since this bullshit also actually happened at a Bruins game the other night.)

Ahem. So yeah, the Yale game went well. Hope they can carry the positive momentum into the second half now. I’m putting the Kubbie Kounter on hold, by the way. In fact, maybe we’ll just do it for the second half. I feel like Guzzo would be running away with it by now though, as he and Gracel might be the only Minutemen who showed up for those three straight losses. Just sayin’.

Basketball

So here’s where we discuss the titular 30 Rock reference. The Minutemen descended into the crevasse, alright. Tuesday’s game at East Carolina might be the ugliest display of bazkettaball that I’ve ever had to witness, right down to the horrific webstream with ECU’s overly excitable announcers and PA guy blasting on echo over an uber-low resolution video that constantly flashed things like “MAKE SOME NOISE” and “DEFENSE.” (You get what you pay for, unless it’s UMass All Access video, wakka wakka wakka!) UMass built a massive first-half lead almost effortlessly, then actually stopped giving effort for a disturbingly long period of time as ECU fought back valiantly before finally shooting itself in the foot one time too many. And I mean damn I’d hate to be the doctor who has to fix up that foot! I can’t say it’s the worst UMass win I’ve ever seen, since I’ve seen them trail AIC late into the first half and beat Fordham at home on a buzzer-beater, but it was a bit discouraging to think that ECU had to miss a flurry of 3′s and free throws for UMass to pull this one out.

But whatever – they did pull it out. A win is a win and this one came on the road, and after a horrific travel schedule the likes of which I haven’t seen this team have in my time following them. Three games in three nights in the Bahamas, a flight home, a flight back to Miami, another flight home, and another flight back down to Greenville? Brutal, especially for a team that runs a full-court press for most of every game. So let’s put this one in the rearview mirror and focus on a 7-3 record and a cupcake schedule between this team and the start of conference play. It looks like the A-10 will be a bitch this year, in a good way for the conference but maybe not for UMass. I figured the conference would be up-for-grabs, but clear front-runners have emerged in Xavier and the Fighting Majeruses (Majerusi? Whatever, they’re fat, and I refuse to acknowledge whatever a Billiken is) and we’ve seen teams like Dayton pull off some nice upsets. Hell, even Fordham has three wins somehow. Really, the only team that looks truly horrible in this conference is – wait for it – oh this is great – weeeeeeeeeee’re Rhode Island born, and we’re Rhode Island (in)bred and when we die we’ll be Rhode Island dead! Yeah, URI is 1-8 with a home win over Chaz-less Hofstra. In a word, epic. (They’ll probably sweep us.) So yeah, any thought of competing for an at-large bid now depends upon running the rest of the non-conference table and making a big dent in the conference. It would’ve been nice to get at least one of the three that they’ve lost so far, but there are still high-RPI teams left on the schedule – all at home – in the form of Xavier, Saint Louis, and Davidson (?!). And really, I think this team is at least as any team in the conference outside of Cincinnati.

There are question marks, of course. For every great story (Esho and Cady being solid out of the gate Morgan coming out of his slump, Carter’s alley-oops, and of course Chaz) there are concerns. Sampson is out for the season, which blows because he was starting to create favorable memories in my head of Etienne Brower, with a combination of length, underrated D and a smooth shooting touch from the line and the arc. At least he gets to redshirt and won’t be leaving us with the rest of DK’s inaugural class. Freddie had been…let’s say not so great coming into last night’s game, then he lit it up for the first half aaaaaand inexplicably was benched by DK for the rest of the game. Not what you want to do to a player who’s….let’s say moody. Look, we criticize the shit out of Riley, and he and Matt’s Twitter spats were well-documented. But we do it out of love, man. We want Freddie to be the spot-up 3-point ace he seems capable of being, but we’re sports fans – we get frustrated when our players struggle, and unfortunately, his shooting numbers make him a magnet for the criticism. (The mess that was the offense the last two years didn’t help, but he’s undoubtedly slumped to start this year as well.) Now, he finally looked to be breaking out of it, and Kellogg sits him on a team that already is a guard short with Laguerre’s academic ineligibility. DK’s making strides from a coaching standpoint this year, no doubt, and the new system on both offense and defense is working much better than anything they were doing the last few years. But unless there’s more to this story (which is certainly possible), I find it highly perplexing. Here’s hoping the team irons out whatever was going on here for tomorrow’s Springfield Siena game. Based on what we’ve seen so far, I’m way more confident about it than I would have been a year ago.

Football

Okay, this post is getting to “way tl;dr” territory. So I’ll keep it brief for now and probably try (ha) to follow-up soon. As a Notre Dame football fan (go ahead, toss the paper balls and boo) I’m pleased with the appointment of Charley Molner. I know, something about the combination of Charlie and offensive coordinator and Massachusetts and Notre Dame sounds like failure. And while both took over for a beleaguered and unpopular coach (I kinda liked Willingham, actually, but the results spoke for themselves), Weis was taking over his alma mater with extraordinary expectations and a storied history, a program that even I’ll admit was moving in the wrong direction on the prestige scale. (Though, fingers crossed, Kelly is slowly righting that ship.) The Minutemen have nowhere to go but up, and out of the crevasse that was (was! WAS! It’s SO good to say that!) the Morris era. Granted the bar may be low, but his rally cry – that UMass should be the best college football program in New England – is solid, and frankly, quite achievable given that BC is in a downward spiral and UConn’s rise to glory is fizzling. True, it’s premature to crown the guy when he’s yet to be a head coach in his career, and we haven’t seen how he recruits yet. But let’s be frank – we weren’t going to get a Mike Leach to come here just yet. The first year might be a little shaky, between the growing pains of an FBS schedule, a first-year head coach and a cupboard left pretty bare. And the pressure’s a little greater than it was for DK, who wasn’t replacing a coach UMass was still paying and who didn’t have a new conference and stadium to work with. If next season’s excitement is tempered by the lack of actual success, well, that’s the crevasse the Morris era has left us in. We may have to dig just a little deeper before we find the way out.

- Max